Roberto Del Boy's Car Boot Sale

Lucas Bergvall wants out, De Zerbi is flogging off the academy like Delboy, and Spurs Twitter has officially lost its collective mind.

Fresh back from France, Simon Lipson leads today's therapy session alongside Fleet Street royalty Julie Welch (bringing love, joy, and industrial-strength profanity) and Cyril newbie Suzie Barnacle.

On the agenda: Bergvall's imminent departure, Thompson & Lankshear off, Savinho & Kroupi riumbling on, why our players suddenly look world-class at the World Cup, and a deep dive into which players would 'suit RDZ's style of play'.

Plus, a fresh round of Room 101!

COYS THFC.